FKMFATIFKYB

here are some abbreviations that will help you in some occasions (most likely when you are texting/chatting with your younger cousin/friend or the younger generation in general, or with a 24/7 chatter who loves writing letters but hates writing words)

• lol-laugh out loud
• rotflol-rolling on the floor, laughing out loud
• btw-by the way
• ic-i see
• b4-before
  
• g2g-got to go
• cul8r-see you later
• irl-in real life
• wtf-what the fuck
• lqtm-laughing quietly to myself
• k-okay
• lmao-laughing my ass off
• lmfao-laughing my fucking ass off
• omg-oh my god
  
• nvm-nevermind
• np-no problem
• omfg-oh my fuckin god
• qt-cute
• stfu-shut the fuck up
• fkmfatifkyb-french kiss my furry ass 'til it french kisses you back!
  
• flip-funny little island people a.k.a Filipinos
  

Avaritia et Luxuria

Gift of Greed and Lust

It was a weird day for Jason Evans, pleasing, but weird. It started when he was on his way to school. While walking on his daily route, he saw a wallet lying on his path, being an average college guy who needs all the money he can get, he keeps it for himself. Jackpot! The wallet was loaded. While he is still enjoying his new found treasure, Sheila Ridge, the campus hottie approached him. Sheila suddenly kissed him torridly right there in the hallway! Then she whispered something to him that made him grin, he nods as a reply. They kissed again as they parted. A second later, he saw Arnold Blunt, his nerdy best friend, running towards him with a huge smile on his acne infested face. He thought that smile was about Sheila’s shocking act, up until Arnold told him that he just won a thousand dollars on the college wide raffle! “raffle for a cause indeed” Jason proudly states. All those pleasant events are nothing compared to what happened next… Samantha White, the girl of his dreams came up to him and confessed her love.

Great things happened to Jason that day; great things… as far as greed and lust are concerned…

Avaritia and Luxuria

Luxuria: it seems like I won.
Avaritia: it’s not over yet my sister.
Luxuria: can’t you see his lust is more dominant than his greed?
Avaritia: sister, what if we change some of the rules eh?
Luxuria: what do you mean Avaritia?
Avaritia: you know I’ll do anything to win him. After all, I am Greed herself.
Luxuria: and your point is?
Avaritia: let’s just say we’ll kick it up a notch…

Jason walks home, the scenes earlier are still playing in his mind. As he passes by a park, he saw two figures by the swing, a silhouette of two ladies. At first he thought they were Sheila and Samantha, he fancies that the two are fighting over him. But as he approaches the swing, the two figures slowly vanished. Puzzled, he turns back and walked away… “Jason” he heard someone called his name… he didn’t recognize the voice, one thing he’s sure of-it was not Sheila nor Samantha. He turned his head slowly; the two ladies are back, only now he can see their face. They are beautiful, but the other one is a lot prettier than the other.

Avaritia: I know what you’re thinking, that Luxuria is prettier than me! Everybody does! But don’t you admire my jewelries?
Luxuria: Avaritia, please be more polite. Forgive my sister Jason Evans, she is not really used to talking with humans…
Jason: do I know you? Why do you know my name? who are you?
Luxuria: I am Lust.
Avaritia: and I am Greed.
Jason: weird names you got.
Luxuria: oh, those are not our names; you asked us who we are. You did not ask for our name.
Avaritia: I am Greed; you can call me Avaritia-that is my name.
Luxuria: my name is Luxuria. I am Lust.
Jason: you got me lost at “who we are”
Avaritia: we are responsible for your so called “luck” this morning.
Luxuria: I satisfied your lust and she-your greed.
Jason: what are you talking about!?
Avaritia: we told you already, we are Greed and Lust herself.
Luxuria: we are not humans Jason…
Jason: are you angels?
Avaritia: angels you say!? Are you insulting us? We are of The Seven Sisters! The Deadly Seven! The Sin Sisters!
Jason: the seven deadly sins are siblings? Are you demons then?
Luxuria: no Jason, we are not demons. We are who we are. The Seven Sins Sisters.
Jason: why did you do those things to me? Do I have to give you my soul or something!?
Luxuria: no Jason, you can keep your soul.

Somehow, Luxuria’s voice comforted him. Luxuria’s voice is sweet, sweet and lustful.

Jason: what do you want from me then?!
Avaritia: nothing Jason, I just want to prove that Greed is more powerful than Lust.
Luxuria: but unfortunately she failed.
Avaritia: not yet my sister. That is why we are here Jason, me and my sister are in a little competition here, and you are the judge.
Luxuria: don’t worry Jason; you will love our little game.
Jason: what do I have to do?
Luxuria: enjoy our little gifts…

The two disappeared in the dark, leaving Jason alone in the park…

Lust
In which Luxuria won

Jason woke up, “just a dream?” He whispers. But he realizes he is not in his room, the room was huge and elegant, just like a presidential suite in a five star hotel. Jason wonders where he is, he thought maybe he is in Sheila’s condo, that he drunk too much last night that he ended up there. Only that he did not drink last night, or at least that’s what he remembers. It all became clear when he saw Sheila; his theory was right after all. Then he remembers what Sheila whispered to her yesterday, “drop by at my place if you want more”…

Greed
In which Avaritia won

Jason woke up; he saw a huge chandelier made out of gold above him. “Where am I?” he asked himself, he walked around the room, admiring every detail of the structure. Then he noticed a “JE” engraved at the bed. “Jason Evans?” he thought. Someone opened the door, “good morning master” greeted the butler. “Good you say? Splendid morning it is!” Jason proudly replies.

Pride
The real ending

“I will not play your little games!” Jason cried. “I won’t let you use me for your own amusement!” Jason walks home. He walks straight ignoring a sack full of money lying in the sidewalk. He saw jewelry scattered all over the street, but he paid no notice. He continued walking… “Jason” someone called his name. He recognized the voice, he turned back… it was Samantha. Samantha pressed herself against Jason, she leans forward to kiss him, but Jason pushed her away. “Quit it Luxuria! You won’t deceive me with your cheap tricks!” Jason exclaimed. He turns his back and runs straight home….
He may have contained his greed and lust, but he kept his pride.

Avaritia: looks like Superbia won eh?
Luxuria: fair enough…

Lucifer appeared beside the two sisters.

Lucifer: did I miss something??



This story is dedicated to Aleth Cruz, for all the nice things she said about my blog, to Joyce Alviar, for saying random (good) things and to Nhatz for spamming messages in the chatbox.

West Side Story

for sale: west side story ticket
price: P1,030-Orchestra & Loge Side (beside my seat)
where: Meralco Theater Ortigas Center
when: october 10, 8 pm
with whom: yours truly. (this is a once in a lifetime chance to watch a play with the funny little island person)

if interested, e-mail me at jbnarciso@hotmail.com

p.s. if you are Maja Salvador, the ticket is yours. :)

Saving Ryan's Private (not a real title, can't think of anything at the moment)

Mask down!
3…2…1… whistle*
The sound of gunshots filled the battlefield… Private N. followed his comrades through the tall grasses. “Hit coming out!” shouted the martial. This early? Private N. thought. He saw his comrade lifting his m4, walking out of the battle field. First blood. Sergeant L. pointed at the bunker, 10 meters away, 1 o’clock, “cover me” he commanded. Sergeant L. swiftly slides towards the bunker unnoticed. Corporal W. and Corporal K. took the other bunker beside Sergeant L. the enemy spotted them! Bullets were sprayed at their direction; they stayed low till the firing stopped. “11 o’clock” Sergeant L. whispered. Private N. saw two guys peeping from the barricade. Fire at will! Private N. saw his bullets bouncing off the enemy’s mask! “what the fuck!” Private N. cursed. “this guy is hit! Admit it you dirty bastard! Where the fuck are those martials!?” Private N. complained. Frustrated, Private N. stood up, ignoring the fact that he’s revealing his position. That gave him a better view; he shot at the enemy, emptying his 600 round magazine. His prey lifted his palm and shouted “Hit!”. The sight of his pawn leaving the battlefield pleased him. One down.

“Clear” Sergeant L. said. They advanced at the grassy area, Sergeant L. and Corporal W. crawled their way towards the enemy’s base while Private N. and Corporal K. are covering them from the rear. Enemy spotted! 12 o’clock. “Hit coming out!” Corporal K. claimed his first kill. Sector clear, the four man team pressed forward. They soundlessly proceeded at the opponent’s base. Corporal W. spotted a small opening, Corporal W. and Private N. stayed low while they move towards the opening. They knife killed the two men guarding the entrance. Sergeant L. and Private N. followed. They can see their comrades from the other side shooting at their direction-at the enemy’s base. The enemy doesn’t know that four assaulters are now inside their base. They can see their enemies but their enemies can’t see them. They spotted seventeen men busy firing at their comrades on the other side, unaware that they are going to be eliminated inescapably. The four lifted their BB guns… It’s like shooting fish in a barrel.

Pinoy pride

Jabbawokeez



these guys are freakin awesome! some of them are filipinos too (although only one of them is a confirmed filipino). they won in the dance reality series America's Best Dance Crew.

Philippine Allstars



2:17 nuf said.


special thanks to Conejo for teaching me how to add videos on posts.

Posts update

You might have noticed that my posts are not as consistent/frequent unlike last month, that’s because I’m working on the La Moderna blog (wherein I am being paid unlike here in FLIP). I’ll try to catch up when I’ve got nothing to do again and bored as hell. Meanwhile, to my new readers out there, you can always read my old posts or read the new ones over and over.

Ideal course

I took fine arts for the sake of getting a diploma. I thought it’s the easiest course back then when I was about to take the entrance exam in UST. Well, so far I’m right; it is so easy that you’ll fail for taking it too easy! Now here’s the course that I would take (if such a course exist).

A course that offers:

• painting
• photography
• technical/informal writing
• a little I.T.
• culinary art
• occasional story telling
  
• physical education that includes extreme sports like war games and sky diving.

I would like to add that catholic schools are very convenient for lazy students, why, you ask? There are no classes every first friday, every novena, every religious occasions and every time a saint is celebrating his/her birthday! That’s why UST is perfect, it is a catholic school located on a flood prone area! Now we also don’t have to go to school when it rains hard!

J.B.

JB is for a lot of things...

• John Benjamin
  
• James Blunt
• James Bond
• John Bradshaw
• Johnny Bravo
• Jonas Brothers
• Just Because
• Jelly Beans
• Jessica Biel
• Jump Board
• Johnny Blaze
• Jumping Bunny
• Jaw Breaker
• James Blunt
• Jingle Bells
• Jolli-Bee
• Johannes Brahms
• Johann Bach
  

when you're bored, you can think of a lot of random nonsense things to write like this one.

Ira

Invidia: oh it’s you….
Lucifer: ira….
Ira: Lucifer! What did my sister do to you to incur your wrath? You know better than to assault one of the deadly sisters!
Lucifer: forgive my actions Ira, your sister here tested my patience…
Invidia: we were just talking sister, no need to get mad.
Ira: you know I’m always mad!
Lucifer: Ira, forgive us… please, do calm down.
Ira: I am calm… Lucifer, I believe you visited Acedia as well, why do you trouble the Seven Sisters?
Lucifer: I just want to visit my deadly sins…
Ira: for what reasons?

Lucifer: sins are the foundation of hell, and you are the queens of sins…is it wrong for a king of Hell to visit his colleagues?
Ira: the Seven Sisters will do their duty… that is our purpose…
Lucifer: and I am doing mine.
Invidia: bothering the sins is part of your duty?
Ira: silence, my sister… I am not done with you yet… Lucifer, if you are done here, please excuse me and my sister, we have some family counseling to do…
Lucifer: of course Lady Wrath, it was a pleasure seeing the two of you…

Lucifer disappears in the dark… leaving the two sins…

Ira: come, my envious sister…
Invidia: you’re not going to scold me?
Ira: scold you? No my sister… it is your nature to make everyone envious.
Invidia: and it is your nature to be wrathful.
Ira: sisters shall not fight…

Ira gave her sister a faint smile….

La Moderna Blog

check out my new blog, it's a blog for our family business.... here's a sneak peak...

Nostalgia La Moderna
By: Angelo Narciso Songco

Growing up in Manila and visiting our family bakery in Guagua, Pampanga as a child; helping the bakers and cashier during summer holidays in my teens; studying hotel school and introducing recipes for new products; I distinctly remember enjoying every minute spent in La Moderna.All my senses were delighted with the sight of bakery employees working non-stop in morning and evening shifts; the aroma of the freshly-baked bread as it comes out of the oven; the sound of the mixers and slicers and the chatting of young Capampangan women wrapping big basketfuls of baked products; the texture of rising dough and flaky crusts filled with smooth egg custard; and of course, the taste of each and every product in its various stages of production.......

you might wanna check it out, http://lamoderna1947.blogspot.com/

FLIP goes international!

check out the map on the lower right side, below the games.... now... go!........
uh huh, cool ay? i have readers from other countries! yipee! I guess i have to improve my english huh?

The Uninvited

Uninvited Guest

It was raining, that night….. when I was peacefully watching pirated series, along came a flying cockroach! I repeat-FLYING. It went in through the window! Motherfucker our room is in the freakin 10th floor! How the hell did he do that!? And why choose our room?? There are lots of opened windows in the lower floors, why us? Why?

This bitch is flying like crazy! She ain’t no cockroach! Roaches prefer crawling than flying! She flies like a bee furchrissakes! That’s my worst enemy… a cockroach who enjoys flying….

Panic

As soon as she enters our domain, I jumped out of my seat and scrammed to the bathroom! My brother is also afraid of the flying shit. He’s being cum laude doesn’t help him in eliminating the cockbitch! According to his calculations, the best thing to do is to tuck himself under the blanket, and wait for the asshole to get tired… she kept on flying while we kept on screaming our lungs out! My move-evacuate to my friend’s room!

Quiet Night

I returned to our room… cautious… I was pressing my body against the wall, grasping a broom, carefully peaking… clear left, clear right… just like war games. All seems normal….. peace…. I asked my brother…. “where’s the motherfucker?” “dunno, gone?” he answered… that didn’t comfort me at all, what’s with the tone of uncertainty!? I was jumpy for the rest of the night… she could be anywhere… waiting for the right moment to scare the hell out of us, or worst… laying eggs!

Deception

The next day… I woke up, no sign of the creepy bastard. I went to school (I do go to school). When I got back, still no sign of her, I resume watching my series….

Flapping sounds disturbing my peaceful time… this only means one thing… it’s going down!

She’s in the kitchen! Behind the microwave! I grabbed my trusty broom… WHAK! WHAK! WHAK! Holy shit she hid under the microwave! BANG! I banged a plate on the microwave, hoping that it will scare her. Crap! It did scare her! But she got away; she crawled her way back to her territory, the back of the closet… I got you cornered biatch! I borrowed a baygon (insecticide) from my neighbor; I sprayed some on the side of the closet-her only way out… Victory!
That’s what I thought….

I resumed my DVD marathon…. After a couple of episodes watched… motherfucker! I saw her crawling up my painting! I was like, “WHAT THE FUCK!” that woke my brother, “she’s back” I whispered… “where?” he replied… and then she’s gone again….. I noticed she was dizzy, probably because of the insecticide. That eliminated her flying abilities. That gave us courage… we searched for minutes, and then… “there!” my brother shouted, pointing at the closed window. She hid behind the curtain… “I’ll go get the insecticide, keep an eye on her” I exclaimed. Again, I borrowed the baygon, coz I gave it back after my “victory”. When I got back, I saw the cockroach flying above my brother who is lying on the floor, bathing on his own blood! Of course I’m kidding! So I got back, armed with baygon, “where is she” I asked…”I didn’t see her leave the window, I think she’s still hiding behind the curtain”. I turned on the light on our miniature balcony. It will backlit the curtain, causing the cockroach to cast its silhouette. Smart move, I praised myself… but still, no sign of her… where the fuck is she!?

The Clash

“There in the kitchen!” cried my brother… I’m sick of this, I told myself… I charged in, armed with a tsinelas… War cry escaped my mouth! “Putangina mo!” the in/famous tagalong version of son of a bitch. WHAK! WHAK! WHAK! My tsinelas slipped my hands! “ammo!” I grabbed another tsinelas! WHAK! “putangina mo!” WHAK! WHAK! I gotta share the glory, your turn brother! Spppraaayyyy!!!! Sppppraaayyyy!! Mother fucker!! Die bitch! Die!!!! Unfortunately, the rice cooker is right in the middle of the battlefield, and I just cooked 5 cups of rice! Damn! Casualties… my brother stopped spraying insecticide; I continued whaking the roach, whaking and cursing… and while beating and cursing the bitch, I remembered my father when he was beating and cursing me! Am I really that annoying back then??

Retribution

The roach ended up in the sink, unconscious, not crushed, I intended not to crush her to avoid a messy aftermath. The bitch is still twitching, she is still alive… good… I’ll make her pay… the steaming rice caught my eyes… it’s a waste to just throw the insecticide contaminated rice, these fallen allies will get their revenge… I scooped a spoonful of steaming rice then I buried the twitching roach with it!

Epilogue

In a dark corner…. Somewhere in room 1011….. an egg hatched…. “mommy? Where’s my mommy?”

Invidia

Invidia loves to walk on earth, she shows herself as a teenage girl, pretty, but not as beautiful as her sister Luxuria. Invidia envies Luxuria’s beauty, she envies Avaritia’s precious possessions, she envies everyone who has something that she doesn’t have. Invidia is one of the Seven Sin Sisters. Invidia is Envy.

Invidia walks the earth….

A tall man approached her………







Lucifer: hi there!
Invidia: oh, Lucifer, it’s you….. do you frequently walk here?
Lucifer: huh…. Oh, no, Invidia, I came here to see you…
Invidia: it’s been a while…. So how’s hell?
Lucifer: …….hell’s power is getting stronger……
Invidia: good for you.
Lucifer: good for me? You are not jealous of my growing power?
Invidia: jealous? Why should I?
Lucifer: last time we met, you tried to cut off my wings coz you want it for yourself! You were…. jealous.
Invidia: oh, that was a long time ago…… I still want your wings… but…. Why should I envy hell? I have a realm of my own….. and it is bigger than you think…..
Lucifer: bigger than hell?
Invidia: Lucifer, I learned that you are no longer the sole ruler of hell, ergo you rule nothing more than one third of hell…. Does that answer your question?
Lucifer: so you are saying that Envy is more powerful than my domain?
Invidia: Envy will come before Evil…. A child will experience jealousy before doing something evil. Cain was jealous of Abel before he killed his brother…..you were jealous of Him before you became evil!
Lucifer: watch your tongue sin sister! I was never jealous of that old bastard!
Invidia: you cannot lie to me Lucifer…… you can’t deceive Envy herself!

Lucifer spread his dark wings and he grabbed Invidia’s neck. Dark clouds blackened the sky, Lucifer was furious….. Lucifer was angry.

Ira: release my sister!

Lucifer turned his head towards the voice….. he saw Ira…….. wrath…anger….

Ira: you will release my sister this instant!

Lucifer calmed down, he let go of invidia’s neck. Anger was taken from him…..

Ira looked at her sister, she was angry, Ira is always angry…... Ira is Wrath.......



To be continued……
Next chapter: Ira